Posted on: February 20th, 2008 Celebrity Playlist

If you don’t know that iTunes has a “celebrity playlist” section, then you fail at life for living under a frigging rock. That’s not to say that its actually any good really. Sure checking it out may be a fun way to waste a half hour, but aside from the occasional nugget of godliness like Brian Wilson or Elvis Costello it has become saturated with athletes and reality show pop-tart princesses providing a list of their favorite songs to dry hump to in the club.

So I figured I would take a stab at this. I like making playlists. I also like spreading the word on good music. And my music is good. And you can’t argue that. Not on this blog. And I also like being pretentious. So here you go, here is my one attempt at arranging a celebrity playlist – not necessarily my favorite tracks of all time, but just tracks I’m into right now. Calling them “tracks” makes me feel like I know what I’m talking about. Now rock out with your rooster exposed.

*Obligatory black & white artsy-fartsy portrait

Someone’s In The Wolf by Queens Of The Stone Age”:
“I listened to this song on repeat for an hour before a job interview once. It was the only interview in which I didn’t get the position. This could be due to the fact that I became feral and pissed on the potted plant and bit the receptionist.”

Panasonic Youth by The Dillinger Escape Plan”: “Listening to this song is the closest you will get to aural-sex. As in sex with your ear. And not in a gentle way. At all. I call it ear-tercourse.”

It’s Gonna Be A Long Night by Ween”: “This is how you do a Rock ‘N’ Roll song. Gritty, sweaty and reeking of testosterone. Don’t call your mother. Don’t call your priest. Don’t call your doctor. Call the police.”

Accessible Losses by Darkest Hour”:
“This song is a slow burn that leads to an explosion of flesh and teeth. DH is the only band to successfully melt my face with EVERY TRACK.”

Ballad of Humankindness by The Dears”: “One of those songs that makes me happy and sad at the same time. Wonderfully human vocals.”

So Did We by Isis”:Be forewarned – listening to this song full blast is akin to looking at the contents of the Arc of the Covenant.

The Cowboy Song by Faith No More”: “It’s tough picking just one FNM song. I really dig Mike Patton’s lyrics in this one. My soul aches for never being able to see them live.”

“Mother Puncher by Mastodon”:First time I heard this, my second pair of balls dropped.

Going Steady by Death From Above 1979″: “If the evil robot Bill & Ted from Bill & Ted’s Bogus Journey formed a band, and were really really good, DFA1979 would still be better. Wait… they were in a band, Wyld Stallyns. DFA… still better.”

Reptillia by The Strokes”:Undoubtedly the most fun you will having playing Rock Band with your friends.”

If Your Poison Gets You by Frank Black”:
“I sing along to this in the car.”

Mama by Genesis”: “If you think Genesis is cheese, go take a dirt nap. This track is chilling.”

Seasick, Yet Still Docked by Morrissey“: “Easily the saddest song ever written. At the same time it is so beautiful.”

Samson by Regina Spektor“: “Makes me feel like I’m in the GAP or an iPod commercial. A sad track, but I like her lyrics and she has a quirky voice.”

Blindfolds Aside by Protest The Hero”:
“Almost didn’t make my list, but it’s a valiant show of young musicianship and a real ripper of a tune.”

While I don’t condone downloading music illegally, if you would like a copy of my celebrity playlist, leave a comment and we’ll see if I can get you a copy. It is highly coveted and each one will come signed. Glossy 8×10’s are extra though.

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